just show up, man.

They say me dumb, fool, way too easy-going, not-a-hater(?!), and etc. But the point is, they say that i am too kind for those two-faced 'friends'.
I don't know, what i know, is that you can't payback hate with hate too. So i assumed that it's better not to talk to those people anymore, rather than to take an action on them, such as revenge or what. I really do not have any idea why you guys should treat me this way. The breakdown, empty promises, no true friends (except the one in sg), i feel so..left down here. It has been 4 months, and i still feel..yah, left down. If only i could have everything i have in my life, I won't take much. seriously, you might think that i am too sensitive or being so pathetic. But how can i stand still without breaking inside? YES you would say that "Shelly, isn't that weak. She could handle this. blablabla."
But that's not what i want. I don't need concern. mark it, I DON'T NEED IT.
I told Shelly about this ard week ago, and she told me that she's feeling the same too right there. and my heart is falling appart as i find the fact that she's facing the same things too. ah, life is not easy. I know i shouldn't complain all the time. Step forward is a must. I am in process anyway, but this things are just like the black clouds over my head.
I want my sunshine. I am waiting for it actually.